my life

2001-07-12 : 8:25 a.m.
Teary holes...

My stupid kitten scratched the shit out of my arm and literally there is a claw sized hole in my shoulder. and so that just totally led to a dramatic and emotional morning. Because my pain from my stomach and the pain from my serious injury only naturally carried over into my hated missing of Justen during the work day. So I started to bawl uncontrollably and he hugged me and said that he was sorry and he wished that we could have the day off just the two of together too, and that he missed me during the day as well.

I don't know why I just couldn't stop my sniffling. The cat started biting my ear as to say," hey I am sorry I almost ripped off your arm and I am here so love on me..."

He really is cute. He sounds as Justen says, like a motorboat. (Fishing, does he think of anything else?)

I am crazy craving a bologna sandwich with Miracle Whip (Yeah baby!!) and salami and some pate and ritz crackers. I know that Pate is goose liver or something gross but hell, it tastes good so why not.

I seriously don't care if its a girl now. Before I would tell you no way in hell do I want a girl. I'm just not girlie enough. I don't wear make up except maybe lip gloss and mascara, I don't do my hair except in a quick 2 second bun, and I wear baggy jeans and tank tops almost constantly. I am not fashion equipped to be a mother of a little girl. That doesn't mean I am fashion stupid. I just don't have the money for Gap shit and Abercrombie and Shits. But I must tell you...I totally fell in love with the idea of a little girl when I went into Baby Gap with Justen and we saw these little dresses and the cool ass jeans that have embroidery from the ankle up to the mid thigh and the little cute bathing suits!!! I am kinda psyched. I know, I am a retard. I don't even know what the hell I'm having yet. But this is a good step for me. Now I don't care.

God I wish I was paid more than $8.50 an hour. Do you realize that only pans out to being 1000 a month??? and I pay rent and a car payment and bills on that. With a whole 10 dollars left over to spend???

I am magical I tell you. and as with everything I HAVE to tell you cause you don't know me personally do you? Nope. Well okay, 1 or 2 of you do.

I love you all!!

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